Tuesday, 30 April 2013

I'm F..I..N..E......

What does it take for people to change? And I mean really change?  How much of our lives are caught up in habit, practice, custom...daily grind?  And how hard would it be for us to shrug off those comfortable covers?  That shroud of predictability?  How much of our lives is controlled by our habits and vices?  Do you have the same morning routine...the predictable way to work...the desk that is, even in a constant mess - still the same, every Friday at the same pub, grocery shopping at the same shops, and then of course the vices...cigarettes, alcohol, drugs?  It takes an enormous effort for someone to change a life habit, especially a bad habit. Ironically, it takes a lot longer to break a habit than it takes to form a habit...and a lot more effort. 

Not to mention the predictable outcomes when meeting people you seldom see... "Nice to see you"... "We really should catch up"...."How are you?" ..."I'm good" ..."I'm fine"...when really we aren't good...we aren't "fine" but it is the facade we put up for other people, the front we show to those that we don't feel like burdening our worries on.  And why is that?  How different would our lives be, if everyone was upfront and honest about how they really felt in that given moment and with what was happening in their lives?  And the truth is...that we really don't WANT to be burdened with other peoples worries. We have enough of our own to deal with so why should we have to subject ourselves to the added burden of our friends and families troubles?  Unless it is life threatening or life changing...honestly....who really wants to know? 

Human nature is an amazingly, entertaining study.  If it ISN'T all about "me" then why should I be interested.  But on the flip side...if it IS all about "me"  then why should any one else be interested? It's a real catch 22.  There is definitely no secret that there are some people that are more interested...and if you have any of these people in your friend circles, they are definitely keepers.  They are the carers, the nurturers, the keepers of your sanity...and usually the most abused of your friends, for exactly the same reasons. They are the voice of reason and common sense.  The voice of truth...and usually the opposite advice that you end up taking.  Try to value these people, they are humanity in it's purest form and life's most valuable asset - life's living angels.

So, if everyone was upfront and honest with each other, would that mean that we would start to avoid seeing people? That we would start to withdraw from any social life we had purely so we wouldn't have to be confronted with other people's problems?  It seems an extreme to go to, just to avoid a minor confrontation.  And it is a scenario that would never happen.   People will always put on the "brave front" and gloss over the gory details of their lives because for just a little while, a few moments - minutes - hours, they truly will be "F..I..N..E" - Fu**ed up.....Insecure....Neurotic.... and Emotional.

How much do you really want to change?

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